Furry Shadows

These doggies, as Charlotte excitedly calls them, are usually not too far away from her even as she becomes increasingly more mobile.

I wonder what is going through her mind when she interacts with them from giggling with glee as she chases them to leaning back on each as a makeshift pillow to hugging them throughout the day.

Dusty Shamrock has been there for me and has been through a LOT with me over the last decade but to see him provide comfort to Charlotte Annie these days as well is so sweet. Hershey, who is a ball of energy, is always at the ready for games and jest much to Charlotte's squeals and delight.

I am so glad we have a fellow doggie lover on our hands!

First Day of a New Plan

Yesterday was Adam's first day of classes and today was my first of teaching for this semester.  With this change in her parents' schedule, today was the day Charlotte returned to the babysitter's house and boy did I miss her!  I was thankful for the hustle and bustle that a day full of teaching three classes and advising just under a dozen students off an on throughout the day brings as it kept me from being sad over not being with our little soon to be 18 month old.  The last three months of being home with her full time flew by and I teared up more than a few times during the fleeting moments of quiet today.  I'm so thankful I have my Tuesdays and Thursdays of uninterrupted time with her this semester.  However, I'm also excited for Charlotte Annie to have regular interactions with a home full of lovely children again.  The thought of Charlotte scooting around, playing with the kiddos, and learning from our sweet caretaker gets me through the long days on campus.

This new semester is full of huge changes for Adam.  Originally we had thought this would be his senior year.  Well, after a change in majors last week, his graduation has been pushed back to Spring 2020.  In the long run, we know this will help him to get that much closer to his goal but it's been a bit of a shock to me to try to wrap my brain around the fact that I will be the sole provider for our family for a couple more years rather than a couple semesters.  I love my job and the work I'm blessed to do but there is an extra layer of stress and worry in being the primary provider for such an extended time yet I'm so proud of the way Adam is chasing down his dreams.  Within days of switching his major, he promptly signed up for an intense three hour series of exams required for his new major.  So far, we know he passed two of the three exams and are awaiting the score of the third portion.  What's amazing is that he took this exam without having set foot in any classes within his new major.  What a feat!!  He is also taking 19 credits of courses this semester which pushes him over the full caseload.  Again, I so admire his dedication and the way he is actively pursuing this new path.

His History major from last semester is still serving him well in his new major of Adolescent Young Adult History Education since he was able to apply many of the courses he took in the spring to his new major.  Due to the super full load and all the work that comes with taking seven classes at a time, he will not be able to do much traveling or participate in many social activities this semester which is a bit disappointing for the social side of me.  In a way, it feels like when I was in grad school all over again with limiting what we can and can't do financially, socially, and time-wise but the sacrifices now are sure to pay off in the long run.  It may be tough on some days but God will hopefully bestow the graces to get through as He did during other times of struggle in both of our lives.

Yes, lots of changes lie in wait for us this fall but I look forward to the challenges they bring and the satisfaction that comes with hard work in making dreams a reality.  What are YOU waiting for...what change have you been mulling over in your mind?  After today's first day of school for me and an evening of snuggling Charlotte, I feel reenergized and ready to tackle these changes head on through some new school year resolutions I've made.  Two are to get back to a regular Adoration hour and to try to get into a more regular workout routine with friends.  Here's to hoping we can all stay on track and work toward our small and big goals over the next four months!

Puppy Love

We can't give our daughter human siblings (for now) but by golly she has such a heart for her furry siblings. This picture was captured tonight after Charlotte spent a half hour chasing after and giggling at her puppies tonight.  Watching her interact with the pups and hearing her laughter reminded me of the sounds of my niece and nephews laughing and playing with one another during the summers I lived with them.  I felt myself start to slide down the all too familiar slippery slope of wishing and despairing over Charlotte not having little brothers or sisters.

So instead, I consciously made a choice to focus on the positives.  Right here, in this moment, she is content and has all she needs in her Dad, furry brothers, and me.  And that is enough.  I will deal with when it is not enough another day when or if that moment comes at some point during her childhood.

Back to tonight, earlier while at church, Charlotte pulled from her mass bag a family picture her cousin, Mason, had drawn for her Baptism last summer.  As soon as she saw the image, her eyes lit up and she excitedly exclaimed, "Puppy!  Puppy!", while pointing to and tracing with her tiny fingers Mason's rendition of Dusty Shamrock and Hershey.

I love that Charlotte Annie loves doggies as much as her Mommy and Daddy do.  How funny is Adam's beard in the image though?!

I love that she gets such joy from her furry brothers....even when it means happiness comes from throwing food overboard from the high chair.

I love that the boys tolerate her playful antics and squeals of glee.

I love that they start each night sleeping in the same room with her.







Most of all, I love that the always present stinging pain of secondary infertility is lessened ever so slightly by quiet still moments such as these.