Resurrection

What a week this has been!  Today, as we end the month of August and get ready to flip the page to September in our planners and calendars, I feel a sense of excitement and being resurrected! 

 

Why?

 

Well, for several reasons that I suppose you could say fall into school, social, and spiritual categories.

 

Let's start with school.  Tuesday was a baaaad teaching day.  The seating chart I worked so hard on last weekend was a disaster and the group activity was a big flop like a fish out of water.  So, come Thursday morning, I felt I really had to redeem myself.  Come heck or high water, I was determined to turn the group activity around into a successful venture while still also getting across the six language theories in an engaging yet informative manner and yes, I would get this done in just 60 minutes. 

 

Well, things went swimmingly well and it was awesome to see some "light bulb going off" reactions flash across the faces of my students as we dove deeper into the theories.  It almost made spending 8 hours planning for this one hour class the night before at the office worth it. 

 

The other school related item that has been weighing on me has revolved around my committee.  For those of you who have been following my progress with my dissertation, you might recall that I've been in a bit of a rut since my proposal defense back in late April.  I have made slow but steady steps forward but have not progressed as much as I should have due to conflicting views/opinions among my committee members.  After a series of unexpected events and a slight change in my committee has occurred, I now have four supportive and "on board with me" committee members which has helped to lighten the weight on my shoulders!  Of course, this does not mean things are all of a sudden easy overnight but the burden has shifted and is a bit easier to carry now.  It almost feels like with the addition of my new committee member, as if the weight of the cross is more bearable.  I wonder if this is what it may have felt like for Jesus when Simon of Cyrene stooped down to help bear the weight of the heavy wooden cross that rested upon Jesus' shoulder when he fell during the 5th Station of the Cross.

 

Moving on to the social category, I have been helping to spread the word about the upcoming NCSC and am so excited to catch up with old friends and introduce them to some girls I'm traveling with from NC.  What a wonderful opportunity for those of us who plan to attend to grow in faith through fun social activities and to make friends with folks from all over the country!!  We are under a month from when this retreat-like conference will take place and I am excited about this trip.  In talking with my spiritual advisor, Fr. Vince, this morning, he reminded me of the importance of being open and putting yourself out there in different opportunities to allow for God's will and work to occur through us, His people.  Who knows what will come out of this conference?  At the least, friendships will be formed and strengthened.  I can't wait to see what God has in store for all those who will attend...at last count, an estimated 400 to 500 folks would be participating in this event!

 

The reasons I feel a renewed sense of getting back up again or resurrected that fall in the spiritual category will be outlined here.  I don't know why I waited so long to talk with my home (in NC) pastor.  After talking with a priest in Emmitsburg, MD on St. Patrick's Day and with another in Dover, DE last month, I sought spiritual direction from my spiritual advisor here in NC.  I feel so fortunate to be able to email my priest and be able to talk to him, in person, about anything and everything.  What a beautiful gift we have in our faith to have that direct access!  Most times, after talking with Fr. Vince, I come away from the encounter with a sense of calm, peace, and clarity.  We need more excellent priests like Fr. as well as other members of the religious, so please take a moment with me to stop and send up a prayer for vocations and continued ministry as well as thanks to these individuals who sacrifice their lives to devote their all to our faith.  It takes a special sort of person to do such a thing in my opinion.

 

I also had the unexpected bonus of Father offering to attend my defense (he has a background in academia and has attended plenty of defenses), which I would never have thought of on my own....what a generous offer!  In envisioning the defense, I can already feel a sense of peace in not only my advisor who has been with me through thick and thin being there and in the supportive mentoring provided by my committee members but the unanticipated thought of positive and calming Fr. Vince also being there...?  Well that's just icing on the cake and further motivation for me to stay on track and be sure all my ducks are in a row.  They might be bobbing in the water and even going around in small circles but hey, as long as they're in some sort of row, I'll be okay with that right? 

 

Finally, as I sit back and marvel on the events of this past week and this morning, I can't help but continue to be amazed at the awesome way our God works when following His will rather than mine.  As the actress who spoke at the pro-life banquet last year said, "When God shows up, He shows up BIG" and I'm so excited to see what he has in mind over the next few months as I wrap up my time down here in NC.  Times are a changing, laws are being passed, the world keeps spinning, and confusion exists but as Fr. Vince reminded me this morning, Love is love.  Jesus was the pure embodiment of going against the trend or what was considered acceptable at the time such as associating with public sinners.  Think of the Samaritan woman at the Well.  Jesus spoke to her when by custom, he shouldn't have since he was a Jew.  Did Jesus care about what others thought of him?  Did he follow the "rules" to a T?  Did he shun the poor, the sick, the lame, the outcasts?  Love is love.  Rather than judging and conforming to what is deemed as appropriate, Jesus showed kindness and love (to those who seek grace and forgiveness).  As a Catholic woman living in 2013, I know some may question my actions or lack of actions but those who truly know me and understand my faith will be able to understand the difference between supporting something that may be happening and showing love to my fellow brothers and sisters.  We are all human and beautifully flawed in this world.  As the old expression goes, A church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.

"Late have I loved Thee O beauty so ancient and so new..
You were within me but I was outside and there I sought You..
in my weakness I ran after the lovely things You created-
You were with me but I was not with You-
the things You created kept me from You..
You called and shouted and forced open my deafness..shined out brightly and dispelled my blindness.."                       St Augustine of Hippo


My friend, Sean Merrigan, created this beautiful image.  Find him on Facebook...perhaps he could create a personal image/quote for you?  :)