Lean into God in spite of Infertility

 I finished a podcast series tonight that I had been binge listening to this semester. It is called Joy & Infertility. 

Those are two words that don't usually go together.... At least not in my experience of walking this path of Infertility these last almost ten years. Two weeks from today will mark a full decade of living out this reality. I said the other day, "It's been ten years--you would think I would be over this by now." 

You know what though? There is no timeline for grief, for shifting of expectations, for navigating firsts and lasts simultaneously, for living life differently than what was imagined, planned, and expected....other than day by day. That is all we can do, really...to offer up each day as the gift it is moment by moment. I likely won't be "over this" until I draw my last breath this side of Heaven.

Tonight, Adam and I found ourselves hosting three college students who came over for dinner as part of a retreat that was happening this weekend while Charlotte played in the yard with a friend. As the dinner was gobbled up by the hungry teens and the table cleared, we enjoyed the conversation and story sharing. They even played two of Charlotte's favorite games before returning to campus. 

Joy and Infertility. I am thankful for the ability to spiritually parent through my vocation as teacher and how Adam and I can serve through our work and ministerial work. Thank you, Lord, for your faithfulness in growing us as people and in our marriage. God writes incredible stories when we let Him.