We are the in the midst of yet another snow day morning. This winter, in our little town, has been spectacular in the amount of snow/ice we have received thus far and I'm enjoying the cozy time indoors with my little family and pups.
We are hunkering down, staying warm, and enjoying the pristine and sparkling white goodness from the warm interior of our little abode. I've got French Onion Soup simmering in the crock pot and can't wait to enjoy warm toasty bread a friend gifted to us last night after a women's book study. It's going to taste extra delicious as I dunk it in the soup later today.
My heart is just overflowing right now and I'm at peace with life, home, work, and even my workload at this very moment. This revelation surprises me as I feel I should be more stressed given that I'm in the trenches of writing and trying to meet my publisher's deadline that is approaching ever so quickly yet I feel calm. I am also thankful for the arts and crafts projects that are keeping Charlotte occupied at the moment and having Adam home for the time being has been a huge help given the increased demands I have been experiencing at work.
So what brings me here today? Well, I took a break from the book writing and grading to write in a different way this morning. Hope you enjoy this little something I wrote during some quiet prayer time today!
I believe in God, the Father Almighty. Maker of our little one who is such a gift to Adam and me, of all things visible and invisible.
I believe in one Lord Jesus Christ, who hears my cries and anguish as I seek to embrace what I did not plan for, born of the Father before all ages. God from God, Light from Light, True God from True God, begotten, did you create me specifically to be mom of one, and only one, even though my plans were for so many more?, through Him all things were made. For us men and for our salvation I am actively leaning into trying to wholeheartedly and without envy or comparison to those who sit on either side of me accept what has been so graciously given to me, and by the Holy Spirit was incarnate of the Virgin Mary, you, Mama Mary, know well what it is like to mother one and only one yet are spiritual mother to so many. For our sake he was crucified under Pontius Pilate, he suffered death and was buried, and rose again so help me to truly feel and hold on to this sense of peace I feel just shy of her fifth birthday and lean into the gratitude, self-acceptance, and ignore the inner critic of not being enough with the scriptures. He ascended into Heaven and I will keep my eyes fixed on your will for my family and me.
I believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the giver of life, who did give me a precious little one and let me see and appreciate that this is more than some are ever given, who with the father and the son is adored and glorified, and I should adore and glorify even from the depths of despair as He can make all things new and transform the suffering as only He can, who has spoken through the prophets.
I believe in one holy, Catholic, and apostolic church even when my family looks so different from the one I dreamt of as a little girl and the ones who live all around us in our little town. For the forgiveness of sins help me to look at my act of motherhood with love and acceptance and to acknowledge that You will give us the grace we need to be as You designed us, and the life of the world to come as I sit here with an open and grateful heart for all that I do, in fact, have.
Amen.
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