Thursday, April 1, 2021

Cultivating Gratitude

Summer is nearly here for this teacher. Only four more weeks remain of this semester. I am so looking forward to some down time this summer. I am not teaching any summer classes for the first time in a long while and will have even more time at home with our girl. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to be with her so much.


I hope she looks back on these days of her childhood with happiness and in the knowledge of how loved she is.

Tonight, as I read chapter 9 in Romans, I was struck by this passage. 



I don't really see myself as talking back to God but, rather, I know I have complained and bitterly wept as I prayed to Him. I have questioned over and over and asked the question, "Why have you created me so?" especially regarding secondary infertility countless times. Just today, alone, a mom reached out to me saying she is expecting her ninth baby bringing on the usual thoughts of why couldn't I be in that situation, God? Why was I made with fibroids and made in this way? Would I not have been a good enough mom to have multiple children and on and on down that rabbit hole...

So this passage was like a spotlight shining right on me because, really, who am I to ask God why? He is the Potter and I am just the clay. Instead of why, the question should be about purpose. What purpose shall this fulfill? What is my purpose? What would you have me do or continue doing, Lord?

I believe it is to mother Charlotte and to "other" mother my students but I am curious as to what else He might have me do. I can't wait to see what is in store! For now, I will try to settle in and rest in His peace much like how Charlotte Annie fell asleep tonight and trust all is well. 



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