Today was such a hard day. It started out alright enough. Dusty Shamrock and Hershey Bear woke me up at 6am as usual. I groggily shuffled my way to the back door and let them out in the dark morning then made my way over to the coffee machine. A few minutes later, after they had returned to the quiet still sleeping house, I fed them and then settled down for some early morning grading with my hot Americano with heavy whipping cream. Soon, Dusty was curled in a ball at my feet and Hershey had put himself back to bed with Charlotte and Adam.
A few hours later, it was time to get up Charlotte and get her day started as she readied herself for school. Dusty and Hershey excitedly came into the bedroom with me and licked and whisper barked at Charlotte as she was roused from her sleep. They are so dear in how excited they are each morning as she awakes (or any of us really) and begins her day.
We all four made our way to the front of the house to the breakfast table where the boys eagerly waited for any spilled or dropped cereal at Charlotte's feet.
I remember smiling as I looked at Dusty's skinny rat-like tail wagging back and forth as he walked between us for he had just had a haircut on Sunday which was four short days ago. He and Hershey look like such different pups after they get their spring shaves and lose half their body weight when the shaggy fur is removed!
Basking in the sunlight - a favorite hobby of the two pups!
Back to this morning, I drove Charlotte to school, chatted with a mom in the driveway, and walked at a local park for about a half hour. As I drove home from the park, I had big plans for getting caught up with grading and responding to overdue emails. I might even get started on writing thank you notes and exercise, I thought to myself, as I pulled into the driveway.
Upon entering the house, and seeing Dusty, I knew something was "off" and not right. I had only been gone for an hour but he was like a completely different dog from when I had left the house with Charlotte. Mom was up at that point and had just brought both Hershey and Dusty in from outside...yet Dusty had to go out again. He had been having seizures more and more frequently these last several days but on the back porch, seeing him have a seizure while standing up, was a first for me.
He wound up having a seizure for about 30 minutes and having a few accidents as he began to lose control of his bodily functions. His legs kept giving way and he could barely hold his head up. He was very wobbly as he tried to walk and was literally leaning against the brick wall of our house when trying to make it back into the house. I was thankful for the sunshine and warmer temps today compared to yesterday's snow as I sat outside with him. I eventually helped him back into the kitchen where I placed him by his water bowl.
I was so thankful that Charlotte was at school and that I was home with him at that point. This was the only morning this week I was home at that time and Adam was home as well. I was grateful for Mom's presence, too. When I first got Dusty, it was a few months before my new lease was set to start at my pet-friendly new apartment so Mom and Dad were the ones who kept Dusty for me for 2.5 months until it was time to move to the new home that allowed for pets! How fitting that she was with him today when she was also with him on the end of the first day of his new life with me as a 4 month old back in 2007.
I didn't start keeping track of time until Adam came into the kitchen after having slept in this morning. Having never gotten up from lying down next to me, and having a few more spasms/seizures, at 10:54am, Dusty's breathing became much more labored. The rhythm of the breathing was almost identical to how my Dad sounded in his final days. By 11:07am this morning, Dusty Shamrock had breathed his last breath. His last hour with us was somewhat peaceful and I was at his side the whole time. His final moments reminded me too much of my Dad's but I was thankful that Dusty didn't wince or cry out in pain and struggled for so little. Being with a living being during the last moments of life is so surreal and all day, I kept vacillating between memories of doing this with Dad and disbelief my little pup of the last 15 years was no longer with us. I already miss the sound of his whisper barks, his nudges from his wet cold nose when he insisted on my petting him, the feel of his velvety ears, the random drive-by lickings he would give, and seeing Hershey and him chase one another around the living room. It will be so strange to wake up in the middle of the night and to not see him lying by my side of the bed against the wall.
Thankfully, Adam immediately began digging a hole in the backyard and took care of moving Dusty's still body. Aunt Marie arrived right then as she and Mom had lunch plans so while we were in the living room, Adam took care of things in the back of the house.
Attempting to get our annual by the Christmas tree picture!
The pups were never far from Charlotte Annie no matter what she was playing with or where she was in the house!
All her life, Charlotte has had her sidekicks and furry companions by her side!
He also was very patient as two year old Charlotte discovered she could make him "disappear" by covering him with a blanket! All those years of being with my niece and nephews prepared him for when Charlotte came along in 2016! ;)
Once Adam was done, we had 90 minutes until it was time to pick up Charlotte from school. We drove to a local Catholic shop to purchase a St. Francis statue and then Lowe's to pick up some sort of stone for the backyard to protect the spot where Dusty was laid to rest. We settled on a sleeping puppy angel thinking Charlotte might enjoy petting it and the imagery it evokes of Dusty having gone to Heaven. We picked up my Mom from her lunch date with Aunt Marie and continued on to Charlotte's school. Once Charlotte was in the car seat, I broke the news to her. She seemed a little sad and then said that Dusty was in Heaven with Pappy. She worriedly said that the "boys like each other" and asked how Hershey would do without Dusty. Once we got home, we got to work on a project for the yard. Charlotte was excited to draw and color a heart on the puppy statue and helped to place the statues in the yard. We used blue and white marble stones to make a cross in the dirt. As we each took turns laying down a colored stone, we shared something we loved about Dusty. Charlotte's items that she shared were: He played with Natalie and her, he licked Charlotte, and he was a good cuddler. We talked about how he was now her guardian dog with her guardian angel and would protect her from Heaven. ;)
He was even into Elsa and other toys that Charlotte would play with near or on him. ;)
This was taken the other day prior to his spring hair cut he just received on Sunday of this past week!
I'm so thankful he had one more bath/haircut so that my last memory of him was of his soft velvety fur rather than the knotted matted mess of hair he had been sporting!
Spot the living dog amidst the stuffed dogs! ;-)
So many special moments...
Dusty and I also had an annual fall photo tradition. See below for what I mean.
http://pagirlmeg.blogspot.com/2012/10/fall-is-best-time-of-year.html
https://pagirlmeg.blogspot.com/2013/10/furry-fall-tradition.html
https://pagirlmeg.blogspot.com/2014/10/annual-fall-photo-with-dusty-shamrock.html
The below picture is the last image I have of him. It was taken on Sunday night after a busy day of celebrating Charlotte during her ice cream birthday party and after getting his hair cut. Charlotte had been worried by the shivering (that we now know were tremors due to the end coming soon) so she had wrapped him in her mermaid blanket. Again, he was so patient! We are going to miss our gentle cuddler! Thank you for the memories, moves, and constant furry companionship over these last 15 years, my little Dusty Shamrock!
Ironically, the pups met Charlotte six years ago tonight since we came home from the hospital at around dinner time on Thursday, March 10, 2015. Who would have thought on that special day that it would eventually become the day we would say goodbye to our faithful furry companion?!
St. Francis, pray for us! 🍀🙏🐶
He will always be with you and especially with Charlotte....Such a blessing to have your mom with you....There is a book called Dog Heaven that is a perfect tribute to a dog who is in Heaven....after dog gets to heaven it runs and runs and runs and then eats ham biscuits and then sleeps on a soft white cloud.....I so remember how patient Dusty was when he had to stay in the laundry room when you lived with your brother's family here.. Rest in sweet love and Peace, Dusty......
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