"P" - pray for your future spouse and the three part prayer
"I" - be more intentional...with your time...dating....and to be selective with whom you choose to invest in or spend your time with while discerning marriage so as to not waste anyone's time.
"C" - center yourself on Christ
Now for the "M"..........drum roll please..........
I recommended that the listeners of the talk allow themselves to be matched. This may seem obvious when thinking about the vocation of marriage but within our dating culture and climate, sometimes we are closed off to being matched even when it is something that we say we want. What I mean when I say that is that sometimes we have a certain stereotype or certain person in mind when we envision our future spouse.
We need to be willing to let go and to allow ourselves to be matched with the person God has in mind for us. This may mean that we need to be willing to be single for the time being which might seem contrary to what the desired result may be. God may still be working on that person or on you. He may still be pruning the branches and getting you ready such as when the branches are pruned to bear fruit and make better wine (John 15:1 -2).
I also think that allowing yourself to be matched means to let yourself meet others in different ways even if unconventional.
Albert Einstein is widely credited with saying, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.”
If what you've been doing is not bringing you closer to your future spouse then maybe a different way of achieving this dream is needed. I sometimes look at others who are so determined to try to meet someone the same way a family member did...for instance, trying to find someone while in college because so and so met his or her spouse as a college sweetheart. I wonder if perhaps the pressure to repeat their parents' love story, or what happened to a cousin or some other relative, might be a bit much or too intense at times for some of the folks I encounter. Or maybe someone is determined to go out to dance clubs or bars every night in a city since that is "where all the singles hang out" and yet the right person is not found time and again. Yet others might stay in and instead lament over the lack of prospects in that town rather than hitting up the social scene.
No matter the situation, I still say...."Be matched - - or be willing to be matched!"....maybe doing so means you will need to switch up the scene or activity or scenario!
Maybe it means putting yourself out there and going to a new club or group.
Maybe it means trying out a new hobby to meet new people through that avenue.
Or maybe it could mean to set up an online dating profile! ;)
Catholic Match is what was successful for Adam and me to meet six years ago. He had set up his profile on a Saturday night and by lunch time on Monday, we were matched thanks to the interwebs. He joked that he should have gotten the three DAY subscription rather than the three month one!
My point is....take down the walls, remove the defenses, be vulnerable (but smart about it), and put yourself out there to be matched.
Who knows...maybe someone you know will introduce you to a friend - - dare I even say a big sister might do this for her little brother?! :D
Maybe the meeting you missed because you got lost will allow you to strike up a conversation with the seemingly random person in the elevator that might lead to more conversation.
Maybe giving someone a shot at taking you out who defies your usual "type" will lead to something unexpected!
You will never know if you don't allow yourself to experience the possible matchings!
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