The Long Goodbye

Today has been spent tending to Charlotte as she was sent home early yesterday from school after getting sick during recess.

None of us have made it out of our jammies as time this morning and into the afternoon was spent changing out the trash can, disinfecting, washing hands, snuggling, and resting as she tries to kick this tummy bug.

I'm glad we could take this time to just hunker down and stay in tending to her needs.

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Taking care of Charlotte today reminded me of when time stood still four short years ago in going through much of the same motions with my Mom and brothers as we tended to Dad during his final days with us.

Four years ago on this exact date was my Dad's last conversation with us. In my twin's words:

I had many conversations with dad between December 16, 2019 and April 17, 2020. The last acknowledgeable one being April 13th. We said what needed to be said....I'm glad I was able to thank him and tell him I loved him....and hear it back for the last time. He said the same. Before starting the first of his morphine, he said I hope the kids (grandkids) remember me.

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Also, on this exact date, nine years ago, I received an envelope in the mail from a winery about 45 minutes from here.

I remember being surprised to receive this piece of mail as I was still new to the area and had not yet ventured to any wineries. It turned out that it was a gift certificate sent to me in anticipation of Adam's and my wedding the next month. Meredith, a best friend from middle school who now lives in Chicago, had sent the gift certificate to me as a new transplant to Ohio and knowing full well how much I enjoyed wineries and paint and sips!

As luck would have it, my former student researcher and I had plans to go to the winery tomorrow to engage in a paint & sip activity. After retrieving the gift certificate I remembered having received, I couldn't help but glance at the date on the envelope. Lo and behold, it was mailed on this exact date. Incredible! As long as Charlotte is feeling better, I plan to still go and hopefully raise a glass in memory of Dad while also being thankful for our health!

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This time nine years ago, time seemed to stand still and take so long as I counted down to the day I would marry Adam in one month and ten days.

Then, on this date, four years ago - time seemed to fly by while simultaneously freezing during the long goodbye as we knew Dad was entering his last days.

Today, at moments, when Charlotte was struggling and in pain, it felt like neverending sickness.

None of us are meant to be here forever...we are all just passing by on our way to our final home of Heaven. With every day that passes, time is getting shorter for each of us as we live our own long goodbyes.

Make every moment count.

Create.

Laugh.

Cry.

Live!