During this season of Advent, we are advised to slow down and be more aware of our actions and the meaning behind them. Rather than just going through the motions in the everyday hustle and bustle of life, what if we deliberately reflected on the things we do (or don't do)?
What if we continued to pour out our hearts into what it is we are doing even if the end results are not what we had hoped they would be? As Mother Teresa would say, "Do it anyway". Sometimes I feel this is easier said than done...especially when the reactions or the silence from others are hurtful and you feel as if you are falling to pieces. Do it anyway. You can't control the actions of others; only those of yourself. I am realizing that your true friends and those who love you, flaws and all, will still be there for you even when differences in beliefs, opinions, ideals, & lifestyles exist. As a co-friend so eloquently expressed the other day, "Yes, I disagree with his views (on gun use) but I am still his friend because that is part of what makes him who he is. No, I will never agree with that part of his life but we're still in each other's lives". When she said that, it resonated within me and helped me to realize that I have to learn when to just let go which is definitely something this loyal old gal has always struggled with as change has not been my best friend over the years. Yet life has been nothing but major changes for me since May 2010 and I can't help but wonder if all these uncomfortable changes have occurred to get me ready for the biggest change of all that will be happening 5 months and 1 day from now. I know it will be lonely (I mean no one likes the feeling of being "replaced") and I will wish things were the "way they used to be" but the truth is...perhaps what I've been trying to hold on to is not meant for a lifetime (as much as that pains me to say) and maybe it was only for a reason or a season.
Reason, Season, or Lifetime
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
— Unknown
So I won't cry anymore because it's over or things have changed. I will smile as I think back over the memories that these days feel as if they were from another lifetime. How does the expression go, "It's better to have loved at all rather than not at all?" Or something like that. ;)
1. The version found written on the wall in Mother Teresa's home for children in Calcutta:
People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.
-this version is credited to Mother Teresa
____________________________
2. The Original Version:
The Paradoxical Commandments
by Dr. Kent M. Keith
- People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway. - If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway. - If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway. - The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway. - Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway. - The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway. - People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway. - What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway. - People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway. - Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.
© 1968, 2001 Kent M. Keith
"The Paradoxical Commandments" were written by Kent M. Keith in 1968 as part of a booklet for student leaders.
(Retrieved from: http://prayerfoundation.org/
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